Its Sunday morning in a land far far more enlightened than the rest of the world, henceforth, giving the country the proud name, ‘The United States of Enlighten-ica’. All the enlightened people of the country have gathered around the television to hear and watch a special broadcast of what the enlighteners in the ‘black house’ have to say, especially one particular enlightener. This enlightener has just broken out into a rap:
Kupuh chukuh kuhhh, kupuh chukuh kuhhh
Check this out yo
Im da real enlightnuh
Yes, im da real enlighnuh
All the other enlightnaz are just enlightna bashin
And all these terroristz be attackin
So I got the real plan, the fo-real plan
To stop all this enlightna bashin
Kupuh chukuh kuhh, kupuh chukuh kuh
Momentary silence is penetrated in all of Enlighten-ica.
“Heyyy yall, wassup all my E’s, how yall be doing,” the enlightener segues into talking mode keeping the flavuh alive and carries on with his ‘fo-real’ plan.
“We the enlightened people care deeply about all the other people of the world, and to give the rest of the world a chance to be as enlightened as we are, we must give them the gift of Democracy. Buctchyasee, Terrorism is the greatest threat to democracy so we must combat terrorism, or die tryin’.
The Gafghans and the Giraqi’s are our biggest problem. We the enlightened E’s must bring down all the terrorist G’s. I have a great friend by the name of Snoop Smith and he modestly suggested a brilliant proposal to me. I couldn’t ignore his idea because it was a solution to all out problems. It offered a brilliant way to completely end terrorism. If anyone offers such a brilliant plan to put an end to terrorism, and it is nothing like what Machiavelli would ever even think of, how could I not implement it? This brilliant plan offers a solution to the current recession we are in by placing a brilliant product in the E supermarket shelves and gives us an opportunity to end terrorism once and for all. When a golden opportunity like this presents itself it is hard for us to ignore it and not take immediate measures to start implementioin. Starting today, we have informed all our E’s in Giraq and Gafhghanistan to start cremating the carcasses of all the G’s who have tried to come in the way of democracy. I have another great friend, a scientist, who recently discussed with me the presence of a chemical in all the G’s bodies.
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